How many words do you speak?

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I have always found it amazing how God made woman so verbal. If given the chance we could talk all day! Then their is the male who can take a whole day of events and condense it into just a few words. No wonder men are from Mars and Women from Venus!

Of course there is always the exception. I have a 10 year old son who can speak nearly double a mans total words in a given explanation or an event that happened that day in school. I can't believe how that kid can talk. Sometimes, I am guilty of not listening to all the details and waiting for the main point. I am almost always telling him to give me just the facts, not the play by play.

Then there is my now teenage daughter who has fewer words than a mummy. I can hardly get a word out of her, unless it is something she is crazy about...boys, and friends. Believe me when I say, I am so happy when she finally does open up and want to talk. I rarely have to ask her for just the facts.

I think that I am a normal woman who tries to get in my allotted 20,00 and Michael is truly a typical 7,000er, but he must use them at work because he ain't using them at home.

I think the best example of a couple using their allotted words is when you get them alone in a car for a very long road trip. I must keep the conversation going the whole trip (unless I am sleeping) so that there isn't any quiet moments. I will talk about anything and everything. I absolutely hate silence, because, obviously there is something wrong if we are not talking. Right! Then I start to analyze what he's thinking because he's not responding or talking back. Why can't I be secure in the silence of our relationship? Why do I have to fill every second? Maybe he has something important or wonderful to say but I just squelched it by not shutting up.

I obviously have to much time on my hands right now to analyze this or maybe, just maybe I am trying to use up my 20,000 words because I spent the whole, entire day with Joshua and didn't talk to a single other woman until 3:00 this afternoon. Which reminds me of my phone conversation with a fellow pastors wife.

She called me while I was in the pick up line at school. She happened to be behind me in line and thought we'd talk by phone. I ended up monopolizing the whole phone call and had to talk a mile a minute about my problem of losing weight. Really, I needed someone to listen to me because my husband just doesn't understand. Then it was time to get off the phone because we were at the front of the line. The next hour I couldn't shake the fact that I made the whole conversation about me. Maybe she had used her 20,000 words and didn't mind me using mine on her! Or maybe I didn't give her a chance to talk.

God mad men and women so incredibly different, He definitely created women with a greater tendency toward verbal expression than men. It's not bad for us to express ourselves with words or wrong for men to be less verbal. But it does mean that we, as women, must be especially careful about how we use our words.

Here is a thought to ponder- Of the 20,000 words a day that women use, how many of them are being spent helping and encouraging others? How many words are spent tearing others down? How many are spent in a selfish or prideful way? How many are spent in anger? How many are spent carelessly and without thought? How do I use most of my words?

Ouch!! I am so convicted right now!

All of this is making me think I should use my words a little bit less and start to use my ears. To everyone who talks to me on a daily, weekly or even monthly basis- please remind me to listen to you if I start to blabber away. Listening is something I could learn to do a little more with my kids, husband, and my friends. And most definitely, when I do open my mouth, I need to choose life giving words. Words of love, encouragement, and wisdom, and other ways that I am not thinking of right now.

“She opens her mouth
in wisdom, And the
teaching of kindness is
on her tongue.”
Proverbs 31:26